Co-Dependency Issues: Learning How to Let Go

25 Apr Co-Dependency Issues: Learning How to Let Go

Psychological Article on Co-Dependency

Psychological Articles by Boomeryearbook.com

All You can Control is Yourself

According to psychological articles we should have only one main responsibility- to make decisions for our own future and find ways to make our own life easy and comfortable. Controlling others and their lives is thus NOT our responsibility and thus cannot bring any happiness. Psychological articles have repeatedly stressed the fact that we with the exception of caring for young children, we can create success, love, and happiness just for ourselves and no one else; as psychological articles inform us that whenever we try to create these states of happiness, love and success from outside we pass on our power to the external world and lose control over the power of creating our own lives. The reason behind this is simple – these states can only be created from within!

Co-Dependency: A Plague

Psychological articles have observed that people suffering from ‘co-dependency’ have typically experienced an emotionally troubled or otherwise dysfunctional childhood, leaving the person unable to detach her/himself from others, to properly attend to personal circumstances, and thus not able to obtain good resolutions of their own problems. Feeling incompetent in their own lives, the co-dependent person becomes needy of others and outer-circumstances, causing an extremely unhealthy personality characteristic for everyone involved. In order to feel competent and important the co-dependent tries to control others; first through showing compassion and advice giving, which inevitable leads to lecturing and emotional black mail. Psychological articles tell us that sometimes co-dependents are simply re-living their pain by recalling their own painful childhood, and in other circumstances they are not only re-playing old familiar patterns of behavior but they are unconsciously trying to “fix” their own dysfunctional situation by enabling others.

Total dependency

Co-dependents are unhappy people and experience intense psychological pain as they are totally dependent on somebody or something other than themselves; a situation that never brings inner peace or joy. Additionally, psychological articles tell us that they oftentimes put themselves in emotionally, financially, and even physically high risk situations as they are so busy “caring for others” that they fail to provide for their own safety. They do not treat themselves with dignity or respect as they have turned over their own power to empower others and never fully gain the ability to identify good personal choices. They fail to get consolation from within, and without as “externals” can not support “internal” emotional needs and well-being.

Look Within

Since unable to control whatever is outside of self, the co-dependent must learn to spare themselves from the pain and unhealthy dependency on others and learn to rely on inner peace and power; making personally useful decisions, and bringing honor, dignity, love and true happiness.

The best approach if you have co-dependency issues, according to psychological articles, is for you to control them by shedding your fear of feeling out of control. To do this, you must feel responsible for your own emotions and behaviors and not try to escape authenticity by associating feelings of gratification with anything or anyone outside of yourself. Only personal responsibility can bring lasting peace and happiness.

Psychological articles emphasize that if you are suffering from co-dependency issues keep the following in mind:

1. You do not have any right to control or change others but it is in your power to control and change yourself.
2. Your attempts at controlling the outside world will only result in your being controlled by it.
3. You endanger yourself by relying on other people and situations for love and safety.
4. You can easily supply love and faith in life from inside youself.

The Psychological Article on Co-Dependency is part of Boomer Yearbook’s continuing series of out of the ordinary suggestions on how to alleviate elderly problems. We believe knowledge is power. We’d love to hear what you think.

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